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When pain Becomes Toxic

How you deal with pain impacts your relationship with God and the quality of life that you will live.

man holding toxic smoke

Toxic Behaviors

Have you ever watched those super-hero shows where they have to save the town from toxic waste being released into the water supply. The big villain shows up! And his way of destroying the beautiful and unaware townspeople is to contaminate the water supply...


I have no idea why this is such a common super hero trope, but you see it time and time again!


Anyway, the hero has to come in and save the day, either by stopping the villain from contaminating the water with some toxic waste or creating some type of counter that purifies that water again.

That type of saving the day is so much simpler for us to understand, because the object of toxicity is not US. Clean the water, save the people. Simple, right? It's a lot more complicated when the toxic "thing" is you.


Clean the you, save the people?

When we have to deal with a person that is toxic it is much harder. Even worse, when WE are that toxic person, it can be incredibly difficult to clean up.



So what do we do when we see toxic behaviors rising up within us? What do we do when we want to grow past the toxic ways that we treat other people? The first step to get to breakthrough is to realize where it is coming from.


Where did the pain arise?

Toxicity is the long term result of underlying pain not dealt with...

If a villain was releasing toxic waste into your cities water supply right now, assuming you were the hero, you would do your best to eliminate the source of contamination. There are two things that would be considered a source of contamination here and they are:


the "villain" (your enemy) AND the toxic waste itself.

In order to "save the day" you would have to defeat your enemy AND dispose of the waste. In our own hearts, dealing with toxicity is similar. Toxicity is the long term result of underlying pain not dealt with. So, if you want to grow, change, and be a better person; you're going to have to deal with your pain.


Beginning The Journey of Healing

I want to leave you with something actionable, but I want to caution you that the first step is the most important. Making sizable shifts in our life can be incredibly difficult.


But here's the thing. You can't undo years of learned and subconcious behavior in a few days. It will take the appropriate time it will take for you to heal.


On top of that, pain is not something that is easily dealt with, going back to the toxic waste analogy, waste in the water is messy. It gets all entangled in a piece of society that produces and gives life to others, in other words it is necessary. You can't just get rid of the water, you have to find out how to fix the issue at hand.


With you, the toxicity is in your heart. Many people resort to turning off their emotions, growing coldhearted, diving into the toxic mindsets; not realizing in the process they are damaging something that is vital to their survival... their heart.


Your heart is a vital piece of your life.

Psalm 34:18 tells us, "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." and Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."

The first step in beginning the journey of healing is to turn TO Jesus, not away from Him and this can be one of the most difficult steps to take, even IF you have been following Him all of your life.


But the fact of the matter is that this is the decision that is necessary for you to breathrough your pain and how it limits you, into the promise and joy that He has for your life.


Finding intimacy with God will break the chains that have limited you from being able to live free from toxicity and finally breathe the way you are supposed to again.


Take that first step, turn to Him again and begin the journey of trust you know your heart needs...


Stay tuned for the next Valley of the Heroic blog where we will jump into cultivating intimacy with God and give you steps to grow closer to God!


If you are ready to break through toxic mindsets today, 1:1 Coaching is the route for you. Now is the right time! Contact me today to discuss if coaching is a good fit for you and capitalize on a free breakthrough session now!



Eric Muñoz Jr.

Valley of the Heroic





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